The answers to the blank spaces within the Personal peacemaking intensive booklet are as below.
Page 4
Misunderstandings.
Differences in values, goals, expectations, interests, culture, or opinions.
Competition over limited resources.
Poor relational skills or emotional intelligence.
Sinful attitudes and desires that lead to sinful words and actions.
Page 5
A culture of peace starts with me.
Building a culture of peace is as much about our heart condition and relationship with God and others as it is about the activities that we undertake.
Page 7
It is our response to conflict that makes the difference.
Conflict is an opportunity to glorify God.
Conflict is an opportunity to serve other people.
Conflict is an opportunity to grow to be like Christ.
Page 8
We start with God.
We look at ourselves.
We talk with them.
We seek to restore our relationship.
Page 11
PEACE–FAKING
Denial: Pretends conflict doesn’t exist or will go away.
PEACE–BREAKING
Litigation: Demanding one’s rights via courts.
PERSONAL PEACEMAKING
Negotiation: Requires collaborative bargaining.
Page 12
ASSISTED PEACEMAKING
Adjudication: To decide only for material issues.
WAIT: There will be times throughout the peacemaking process where God calls us to wait patiently.
We bring peace into a conflict when we start with God.
A peacemaker views conflict not as an accident, but as a stewardship opportunity.
Successful peacemaking means focusing not on results, but on dependent obedience.
Walking in obedience begins by opening ourselves up to the work of the Holy Spirt in transforming our hearts.
Page 13
Being a peacemaker is more than a decision to act a certain way or acquire a set of skills.
Being a peacemaker means going on a heart journey with God.
Page 16
So, knowing what drives the conflict can help bring swift resolution and peace.
Left unchecked our desires can become idols in our lives.
Page 17
Controlling desires typically are something:
We CRAVE (must have)
We FEAR (happening or not)
Where we TRUST OURSELVES NOT GOD (misplaced trust)
Page 20
Godly grieving is not just letting go, but being open to possibility that disappointment and hardship have meaning – to draw us closer to God.
Page 24
First step: go in private with the person
Second step: go with others, take one or two others with you
Page 25
When is overlooking appropriate?
No wall created
No serious harm
Not a pattern of destructive behaviour
When to go in private…
When someone’s sins are too serious to overlook. (Matthew 18:15)
When someone has something against you. (Matthew 5:23-24)
Page 26
Willing to offer an apology
Not commit ‘assumicide’
Bring the hope of the gospel – believe the best
Plan
Prepare
Pray
Affirm
Apologise
Ask
Time
Humbly listen
Share with kindness
Page 29
Be honest with ourselves
Share your response
Page 30
A decision to extend mercy. An action to show mercy.
Page 31
I promise I will not dwell on this incident.
I promise I will not bring up this incident and use it against you.
I promise I will not talk to others about this incident.
I promise I will not allow this incident to stand between us or hinder our personal relationship.
Page 33
Reconciliation requires repentance, confession and forgiveness.
Forgiveness does not necessarily release us from the consequences of our sin.
Page 38
Blessings of a culture of peace
Conflicts are resolved personally and privately.
Grudges are not held & there are fewer undercurrents dragging people down.
Conflicts are turned into opportunities for people to be freed from sin and mature in faith and character.
Peace and reconciliation become marks of your family, church and workplace, glorifying Jesus Christ, enhancing your witness, and spreading the gospel.